A Hymn about a hem

I grew up in an age where finding jeans that were long enough to meet my ankles was a basic impossibility. Thank gawd for MC Hammer, MC Breed, and TLC ushering in the age of baggy jeans for all. I still get a warm and fuzzy feeling when searching for a black pair of skinny jeans in a 16 T or L (online of course, cause, really searching in a store is like looking for a straight line in a polka dot parade) and I find a pair at Ashley Stewart made for a tall/thick’ems like me. I’m always looking for stores and brands that fit me well. It’s hard enough trying to find long sleeves that cover my wrists, or skirts that actually hit my knees appropriately, but try being tall and curvy! Finding hems that fit is a religious experience to say the least. Wrote a song about it. Like to hear it? Here it goes:

*to the tune of Take Me Out to The Ball Game*

Can’t find jeans that can fit me,

Bottoms rise up so high,

Then not to mention my favorite pair

End up with holes in my inner thigh

So it’s yay to internet shopping,

Stores are for shorts it’s a shame,

So it’s time, I, keep looking out,

Because floods are lame!



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s